Episode Eleven

Kemperbad

Musings on the Nature of Democracy and Riverboats

We awoke on the boat early in the afternoon and Igor healed our wounds after our encounter with the undead in the cellar of the watchtower the night before. Returning back to the dwarven encampment, we were greeted by Angels, who gave us a reward for felling the ghoul that had been preying on her workers. Deagol was quite smitten by her stout frame and well-tended beard. We enquired about the magic amulet from the ghoul, but none of the dwarves could give us any more information. We decided to investigate the watch tower further, which almost cost Viggo has life when he fell from the first rung of a ladder. There was nothing more to be found in the watch tower except a fine view of the wintery sunset. We took another glance around the cellar and took some further books to sell on. However, we came no closer to unlocking the secrets of this mysterious place. That night we slept again in the watch tower to assure the dwarves that the danger was truly dealt with and set out the next morning after being paid.

A short way along we stopped at a small village where we visited the Suspicious Owl tavern to catch up on gossip. We were told that an army was being raised in Kemperbad, so there could be work for us. We ate, got takeout for Renat and Deagol won an arm wrestle. Leaving the village, we damaged several jetis because sailing, unlike climbing ladders, hasn't been nerfed yet. On the stretch of river towards Kemperbad we reviewed our strange findings at the lonely watch tower. Linthan identified has new staff as making him imperceptible to the undead. Analysing the astronomical notebook, we realised that the triangle marked on the map corresponds to the orbit of Morslieb the Chaos moon, with the bottom vertex lying just to the north-east of Kemperbad. Our arrival in Kemperbad was delayed by an encounter with a very enthusiastic NPC called Pete Hammond who was keen to chat.

On arriving in Kemperbad, we were amazed to see the impressive winch system for ascending to the city above. In the dock, Viggo was approached by Furio, who extended him an invitation, or perhaps more likely a command, to meet with Uncle Luigi (a local mafia boss) in the Crown and Feathers pub. We tasked Renat with selling the iron and found someone to repair the hull damage to our boat. On our way up in the lift, we were each beset by dark voices in our heads, urging us to cast ourselves into the waters below. I felt as if this would somehow cleanse me after all the mayhem and darkenss I have been through with my reprobate friends. None of us actually did it though. In the pub, we were delighted to find Pete Hammond again. He arranged for us to buy some mail chausses, which saved us a trip to the market. Uncle Luigi was expecting us and called us into the backroom to talk. Linthan was jealous of his fancy hat. It turns out that Viggo has some unfortunate history with Luigi. Viggo assures us it was just a job gone wrong and that he was betrayed by another gang member. Luigi sees it otherwise and tasked Viggo with transporting some mysterious boxes along the river. He was menacingly adamant that we must not under any circumstances look inside the boxes. Deagol immediately decided he wanted to open the boxes. Luigi also told Viggo he should visit his mum whilst he's back in town, so we popped over for an uneventful cup of tea. She told us that Uncle Luigi had been very good to her. Viggo gave her some money and told her to go and see a doctor.

In the lift on the way back down to the dock, a man with a purple hand ripped some hair from Viggo and made off. We are still no closer to working out why they keep pestering us. Back at the boat, we found that Renat had traded the iron and reinvested in brandy. Viggo used his amazing power of taste and assured us that the brandy was good shit. The bottles have a DOC marking from Tilea. We got the boat hull repaired and Linthan, without consulting anyone, bought a dog. Democracy was not observed and he decided to call it Hammer, over the group's protests. Teugen would have been a much better name. Back on the boat, Deagol was desperate to open the crates, especially the heavy coffin-shaped one. This time, it turned out democracy does matter and he was outvoted.

We set out again along the river, having completely forgotten about the military quest in Kemperbad, but back on our path to find the wicked sorceress lady. We quickly ran aground again. There was some funky roiling in the water and we were ginger of another attack, maybe by another tentacled squid-man, or worse. However, this time it was Linthan who found his redemption in the form of two squeaky-clean gusts which freed us without event. Renat was complaining of illness and Igor failed to diagnose her affliction, so we decided to stop at the West Bank to seek medical attention. Pulling into the dock, we again ploughed into a jeti. Deagol was already getting quite lairy at this point and fed up with the general mechanics of sailing boats. He was abusive and threatening to the dock master, but in the end we had to pay him off. We found that the entire village was under quarantine and we couldn't enter after all.

Along the river the next day, people warned us that the dwarves had been playing up and also told us to stay to the east side. They were very unhelpful and wouldn't tell us why. We soon found out, when we were attacked by a pirate vessel from the West Side. They assaulted us with crossbows and pistols and tried to board us using grappling hooks. Linthan's channeling was interrupted by a hit from a crossbow bolt. Our dog Teugen would not be charmed to cut the grapples, but he did attempt to help by barking. Deagol also wanted to cut the grapples, but then Boatgate happened. The layout of the boat was not to Deagol's liking and he very begrudgingly had to go the long way around. After this setback, things started looking up. Igor and Deagol successfully cut through the grapples, allowing us to move off. Viggo killed a man. As we were making our way off, Linthan finally had enough energy channelled and unleashed the awesome destructive power of the comet of Cassandora on the pirate boat. The West-Bank pirates were completely obliterated, but sweet victory was fleeting. Looking down, we saw that the pirates had managed to get off one last shot and Teugen had taken a bolt to the face. Igor managed to heal him though, so it was fine.

Igor thinks there is a vampire in the crate.